There is one word we keep hearing from people who visit the Wings of Hope memorial site - peaceful. We invite you to visit the memorial site - a truly peaceful place for reflection - and experience this for yourself. Even if you have not experienced pregnancy loss, come and read the names and inscriptions on the pavers and take in the beauty of the central monument. There is something profound about reading the sentiments and feeling the heartache - and hope. The new benches, installed by Tom Miller and available through him for engraving, give you the perfect perch for taking a few minutes to pray, remember, or just be still. Visit with by yourself, with a group of friends, or family - you're all welcome during the regular cemetery hours (and you can drive right to the monument and park on the road in front of it), from sunrise to sunset.
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For a woman who experiences the heartache of a miscarriage, that heartache is often intensified when she is forced to ask herself how to care for the remains of her child. There is typically no standard path or protocol provided by the medical community, the first resource we look to when we experience a death. When the Wings of Hope committee began to put the pieces together for the memorial site, one of the most significant pieces we knew we needed in place was a resource for these women. And when we first approached Mankato Mortuary we honestly were just not sure how our request would be received. It was at that very first meeting, however, that Mankato Mortuary stepped forward and stepped up – agreeing to work with us in offering these services that had not yet been offered in the Greater Mankato community. Women who experience a miscarriage before 20 weeks gestation can contact the mortuary to make arrangements for the remains of the children they have lost, even for first trimester losses. These remains will be cared for with dignity at the mortuary until the time of common burial at the Wings of Hope memorial site. For those who do want to participate in the common burial for the remains of their child, the mortuary is still available as a resource to work with them to make private arrangements. We want to express our heartfelt gratitude to Mankato Mortuary. Without their support for Wings of Hope, families across our region would still be lacking in much needed resources. Because of their support, the heartache and needs of families are met with empathy and compassion. Last night when I stopped by the Wings of Hope memorial site to check on the new fence, I was met with a bittersweet surprise. The first of the pavers had been engraved, and among them were my own and those of my family. As I circled the walkway, reading the names, sentiments, and remembrances, the tears fell as I was struck with a mix of emotions. Names of babies loved and lost. Some lost decades ago and some achingly recently. Words of comfort from community members. Yet these words on the pavers are more than just carvings in stone. They are steps in healing for women, for families, and for a community as we come together to find a way to support each other in pregnancy loss. They are reminders that we are not alone, and that the lives of our babies lost in pregnancy are still cherished. - Chris O., Wings of Hope Chair [NOTES: There are more pavers completed than pictured, and there are still pavers to be engraved. If you would like to know if your paver has been engraved, please send me a note with the description of the paver - I have pictures of all completed pavers. We will update you here when all of the orders have been engraved. There are also still pavers available for engraving. All proceeds go to pay for the central monument, which we hope to have installed next week, and for the costs related to Wings of Hope services.] As the Wings of Hope committee continues to plan and prepare for the Evening of Remembrance, we are reminded of the generosity of the community of Southern MN. In less than a year we have gone from a bare plot of ground at the cemetery to planning for the first burial and remembrance service - the circle of the monument site representing this full-circle moment. And none of this would be possible without the support from the community. An example about this support comes in the way of flowers - but it is much more than just flowers. Hilltop Florist and Greenhouse will be donating white carnations for each family who wishes to recognize their children lost in pregnancy. During our Evening of Remembrance these families will be invited to place a flower at the burial urn, and say the name of that child if they wish. Each carnation will represent the life of a cherished child, and will provide an opportunity for some of these families to, for the first time, publicly recognize that significant loss. At the entrance to the memorial site we have two pillars, and in preparation for the Evening of Remembrance, a family touched deeply by the grief of pregnancy loss is donating two beautiful planters to rest atop these pillars and welcome visitors to the site. So when you go to the memorial site, you'll see not just the flowers, but symbols of love and support - in memory of the Demuth 9. These are more than just donations of flowers. The generosity of Hilltop Florist and Greenhouse is a demonstration of the kind of community support that we need and so appreciate, a way of embracing all of those in the area affected by pregnancy loss. The generosity of the family donating in memory of the Demuth 9 reminds us all that in grief we can rise to help lift others. These flowers are hope. Thank you to all who have donated time, money, and resources to help support families of Southern MN who have experienced pregnancy loss - and for a future in the area where those who experience this type of loss will feel embraced by our community. The salesclerks at the local shops likely thought we were just another clan buying flowers for Mother’s Day. And we were – but for a very special project – the Wings of Hope memorial site at Calvary Cemetery which offers an opportunity to remember all of the lives lost to miscarriage, stillbirth, and newborn death. Celebrating Mother’s Day at the cemetery might not be a joyful, peaceful, and empowering experience for many. But that is just what it was for me today as my mother and daughter joined me for planning, selecting, and placing the flowers and river rock (with some additional and much appreciated help from my husband and son). It was much more than landscaping. For my mom and me, we were there as mothers who have lost, and as mothers who wished there could have been something more during those dark days. We were also there as women wanting in some small way to provide that something more for the next generation. It was about more than planting flowers and shrubs for Mother’s Day – it was about planting seeds of hope that families who experience the grief of pregnancy loss can also experience the comfort of knowing they do not have to travel the journey alone. Happy Mother’s Day to my own mom – and to all of the mothers out there who have ever loved a child. Chris O - Wings of Hope Committee Chair Please join us for our very first service to remember the lives of children lost during pregnancy and newborn death. We would also love it if you could help share the word - you never know who might need this in their lives and how showing your support at this service might affect those in our community.
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The journeyThe members of our committee have all been on the journey of pregnancy loss, but in different ways. Learn more about why they are all so passionate about bringing awareness and comfort to families who lose a child during pregnancy. Archives
October 2020
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